By His wounds, we are healed

The Problem with Procrastination

Pushing work away when all you want to is just have fun. We all face it. It's just a matter of how we decide to suppress it and how much we allow it to take over our lives.

Exhibit A. Me.

I am one of those people who procrastinate to the max. I am just PLAIN lazy. Oh trust me, I know I have things to do and if I don't complete them, I'm screwed. And yet, here I am making a blog post ABOUT delaying said work. It's crazy.

For example, I have a theory (which is more like a bad habit). If I spend all my time today doing the things I want to do, I'll spend all my time tomorrow studying. However that never works, because I do the same thing the next day, followed by the day after that and... well, you catch my drift. It's an endless cycle of unproductivity, hedonism and just feeling really guilty the next day. But do I let that guilt affect me in a positive way so that it'll motivate me to work harder? God, no. I let it make me feel guilty, and then I repeat the same mistake.

I also do this thing, where if I get obsessed with a game like The Sims 3, my theory is that if I play SO much I get so sick of it, I don't even want to touch it anymore. Which is very bad way of managing time but here I am doing it LOL.

And this is ruining my life. I'm sitting for 15 papers this semester, exam's in May, and here I am not studying. It's basically suicide.

Sigh. When will I ever learn.

"Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him" - Charles Dickens

Also, I'm planning to edit and change my current layout!
(ETA: I've edited it, but something is wrong with it as my links are all appearing blue ugh. I'll change it soon!)

If anyone is somehow still reading my blog filled with posts of questionable quality and sanity after 5-6 years,  CONGRATULATIONS you deserve a virtual cookie

Beauty in a box

My mum recently subscribed (then unsubscribed, but that doesn't mean she didn't like it, more about this later) to two beauty boxes. Wonderbox and Modbox.

Before this, I have never heard of these things called 'beauty boxes' and my mum explained to me how it was essentially a box with different beauty products inside. 

Now for a girl, I'm not very girly. I prefer playing games over shopping (but that doesn't exactly mean I don't like shopping, it's just because I just can't find clothes that fit me, and looking around for clothes that don't fit me is not only very discouraging but depressing), I do things usual girly girls won't do, I'm rough and inelegant.

But, I try to be girly once in a while to remind my parents that they have a daughter instead of a son, and my girl friends that they befriended a person of mutual gender who sometimes has the same girly interests and tendencies as them. I'm serious, I have been scolded for not being girly enough (who does that?!). By my Math lecturer who caught my friend and I playing cards in class (In our defense,we were NOT even gambling, we were playing 'speed'!) and apparently playing cards is not a sign of femininity; by my grandma who thinks bouncing on couches is a man thing and some other instances I can't recall right now.

Oh yeah back to the beauty boxes.

However, I pride myself in actually liking these beauty boxes. I'm not like those girls who are naturally born pretty: who has skin as white as snow and as smooth as silk, and whose figure is slim. I am the opposite of that. I am the ogre of girls. If this were Shrek the movie, I'd be Shrek in DuLoc (the town in the movie). By the way to clarify, I'm not playing the genes card here.

So to reinforce whatever little beauty I have, I use products.

And you know that joy one feels when you find the perfect dress? One will feel it too when opening a beauty box. 

I swear, whenever the box arrives at my house, I shriek excitedly at my mum to open the box (another sign of how feminine I am eh). And when I open the box, I feel exhilaration. It's so fun to open a box of unknown things but you know they're gonna be awesome. It's like opening a Christmas gift every month!

These are a few things these boxes contain. I may not use makeup, but now that I have them and I'm no longer a teeny bopper I used to be, one day I'll have to learn how to use them when the right time comes.

So even for a girl who doesn't feel like a girl sometimes, this box makes me definitely feel like one and solidifies the fact that I am a girl GIRL inside. :D

In the end though my mum unsubscribed them because we weren't using them fast enough for new ones to arrive again the next month so... but I'm sure we'll re-subscribe again one day :)

P/S: In reference to my last post, I am doing horribly in the 'completing every homework' task. So much for new start.

Thoughts of a long-haired turned short-haired girl who just signed up for gym

YES I have finally cut my hair! And this time is a big achievement for me because for once in my lifetime, I DIDN'T CRY. Everytime I cut my hair I cried.

I was an easy child to punish. My parents used to punish me for getting bad results in my exams by bringing me to the salon to cut off my hair. That easy.

And that's how much my long hair means to me. And since I was 7 I think, I've never had short hair. I've always let my hair grow into a long tress of mess.

After perming my hair, my hair became so damaged, there were TONS of split ends, almost 1 out of 5 strands of hair. It was crazy, and it broke my heart to see my hair dying. Also, I'm losing hair so much, I'm balding. THIS COULDN'T GO ON.

So I decided on a whim to cut my hair at 9pm. The barber and my mum suggested I cut it short for once. And I've always wondered how I'd look like with short hair right now, so I made the craziest decision this year so far. I was totally expecting myself to cry. I even warned the barber beforehand that I would cry after my hair got cut sometimes (understatement).

After everything, the funny thing is - I don't think I regret it. I'd say I was a brave soul for cutting so much hair off and not burst into tears.

The first person I thought I looked like was my cousin. Second? Dianna Agron.

Except that I wasn't smiling as wide as Dianna when the barber cut MY hair.

Some of the thoughts that ran through my head for the last 24 hours of having short hair...

...."OMG it's so light!"

...."It feels so much cooler now :D"

....*flips hair to straighten out hair* "THERE'S NO MORE HAIR TO FLIP D:*

...."Yay no more sweat-damped hair sticking to my neck anymore"

...."My neck... feels so... exposed"

...."No seriously my hair looks exactly like my cousin's now..."

However my own reaction to my short hair was not as huge as my college friends' reactions. Went into the lab, and I was met with Sandra's dropped jaw. Pei Ru and Xin Qi followed suit. And then so did everyone else lol. It was funny to see how they reacted to it, but I totally get it and it's a very appropriate reaction :P 

Also signed up for gym! And like I've said on twitter, my parents are more eager for me to lose weight than myself. And no matter how polite people are by saying I'm 'not fat', I AM. It's a fact! I'm not denying I'm overweight, in fact, of all people I am the one who knows that the most and feels the most conscious about it because it's my body. It doesn't help that my parents remind me of how fat I am almost on a daily basis.

I've cut my hair. I've signed up for gym. So far, I'm doing okay on completing my homework everyday (that'll die soon I'm sure). I'm trying to be less emotional. Feels like I'm going through a mid-life crisis. But this is more like an early-life crisis.

I've always been wanting to start afresh, and now's my chance.